40天真心爱大挑战之1：拔除杂草

夫妻关系碰到危机，比如外遇，一般都不是一件什么严重的事引发的；往往是长期积累的问题。冰冻三尺，非一日之寒；就好像一棵枯萎的玫瑰花树，不是一夜之间就枯萎的，而是长时间没有及时的浇灌、施肥、除草而造成的。更新或者修复一段受损的关系，就像救活一棵枯萎的玫瑰花树，奇迹不会一天发生；这是一段旅程。但只要开始踏上，就有希望。让我们先从除去杂草、石块开始。（编者）
【第一天】Day 1
Resolve to say nothing negative about your spouse today.
今天，请努力不说有关配偶的坏话 (负面的评价)。是的，一句也不说。
相关经文：
<Eph 4:2> Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
<以弗所书4:2> 凡事谦虚、温柔、忍耐、用爱心互相宽容。

【第二天】Day 2
Do at least one unexpected gesture to your spouse as an act of kindness.
至少做一件让配偶意想不到的事情，来表示你对配偶的好意和善心。
相关经文：
<Eph 4:32> Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
<以弗所书4:32> 并要以恩慈相待，存怜悯的心，彼此饶恕，正如神在基督里饶恕了你们一样。

【第三天】Day 3
Buy your spouse something that says, “I was thinking about you today.”
给配偶买点东西，来表述心意说：“我今天想着你！”
相关经文：
<Rom 12:10> Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.
<罗马书12:10> 爱弟兄，要彼此亲热；恭敬人，要彼此推让。

【第四天】Day 4
Contact your spouse sometime during the day and ask how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.
给配偶打个电话或留个言、问个好，看是否能帮他/她做点什么。
相关经文：
<Gen 2:18> The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
<创世纪2:18> 耶和华神说：“那人独居不好，我要为他造一个配偶帮助他。”

【第五天】Day 5
Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them.
询问配偶，让他/她告诉你三件事，三件你让配偶在平时生活中感觉不爽的事情。 请千万留意你不要因此而反击你的配偶。
相关经文:
<Pro 27:14> If a man loudly blesses his neighbor early in the morning, it will be taken as a curse.
<箴言27:14> 清晨起来，大声给朋友祝福的，就算是咒诅他。

【第六天】Day 6
Choose to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation.
请选择用友爱的方式，而不是用怒火来应对婚姻中的礁石。
相关经文:
<Pro 16:32> Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city.
<箴言16:32> 不轻易发怒的、胜过勇士；治服己心的，强如取城。

【第七天】Day 7
On a sheet of paper, write out positive things about your spouse. At some point during the day, pick a positive attribute from the list and thank your spouse for having the characteristic.
在一页纸上，罗列出配偶的优点。然后，时不时地从中找出一两项，来赞扬和感激配偶的这些优良品质。
相关经文:
<1Co 13:7> It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
<哥林多前书13:7> 凡事包容，凡事相信，凡事盼望，凡事忍耐。

来源：网络